Campaign of Shame

I am living in a country where it seems there is no shame. No concept of remorse, a convenient view of right and wrong with a stifling, almost senseless self-awareness—that being none. There is no shame when you are drunk at nine in the morning. There is no shame when you’re drunk at nine in the evening with a baby on your back. There is no shame when your child is suffering from malnutrition 10 feet away from you as you buy another bottle of beer. There is no remorse when you show up a half hour late for a meeting. There is no remorse when you show up two hours late for a meeting. There is no remorse (or shame) when you are caught stealing cookies from a 10-year-old boy when you are a grown man.

I don’t want to be called a Satanist in the streets and see teachers having “sleep overs” with young girls. I don’t want to be bullied into going to church by women who show up half way through the service. And I have had just about enough of being approached by married men. Justin Timberlake is apparently bringing “Sexy” back, well I would like to bring shame back. I want a campaign of shame. I want village shamers. I want reinforcements. Most days I have enough righteous anger to clear a way for the Lord. But trying to make people ashamed for their actions when they don’t have a grasp for the concept is unfulfilling and often spirals into a fit of rage when you next see another Peace Corps volunteer.

I was prepared to be defeated and disillusioned before I came here, but I skipped right past that to irritated. So I have spent some time pondering about where I acquired my keen sense of shame. Is shame a Dutch thing that trickled down from my pious ancestors? Is it a Christian Reformed thing or maybe just Calvinist or Puritan? How about the Mid-west, is shame and crippling guilt our thing? (Clearly I am hesitating to let all of America into the blessing that is shame.) Is it in the water? Can we import it? Possibly start immunizing children for the lack thereof?

I thought that I knew about people not having shame, I thought that Americans had actually written the book. As it turns out the magnitude at which it happens here is far greater per capita. We can all either pat ourselves on the back for not being at the top of the domestic (I say domestic since we clearly have some international shame on our backs) shame pile or we can weep for the state of life here that has apparently killed shame.